Thursday, January 31, 2008
"sometimes it just feels as though everything that i want seems to be asking for too much.i find myself dying to make you know everything that's going on deep within;the feeling of wanting so bad to talk to someone but finding yourself having no one to turn to.the feeling of pretending that everything's fine despite being flooded with unhappiness.the feeling of being angry yet making yourself shake the anger off within 3 seconds.the feeling of being so worn out and still forcing yourself to go on.the millions and millions of feelings that's going through me;i really wish you could understand it all.i'm trying so hard;not knowing if it's worth.maybe like what i've always been telling myself;you love me in your very own way.but at times i really doubt.only time will tell;i guess.but i find myself drained of all the energy to move on;once again."The Bottom Line.
9:59 AM
she writes
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
and so;
cycling trip tomorrow is officially cancelled.
:[
was so super looking forward to rid some fats.
shall go shopping instead.
very badly needa "get out".
too many things in mind.
too much stress building up.
and it definitely doesn't help when your parents are especially irritating recently.
super fucked up!
rraaaawwrrr!
so shopping tomorrow anyone?
Flawless.
2:33 PM
she writes
Monday, January 21, 2008
if you have yet to realise.
i just wanna let you know.
everything has changed;
everything.
and nothing will ever be the same again;
nothing.
i don't know if it's you;
or maybe it's just me.
Goodbye Goodbye.
3:28 PM
she writes
Saturday, January 19, 2008
haven't blogged in ages.
i know.
but i guess it's prolly understandable.
when you have to juggle school, work, boyfriend and friends.
and in addition.
help your mum out with the cny goodies.
do your cny shopping.
as well as catching up with the good stuff that you've been missing out.
prison break!
or micheal scofield to be exact.
*drools*
haha!
so i guess i prettay much owe some updates.
well.
shall just start off with school.
school have only started for two weeks.
and i've already like skipped one lecture;
just to go shopping for chinese new year clothes.
but i ended up coming home absolutely empty handed.
:\
and it definitely doesn't make me feel anywhere better when i remembered that i've been telling myself that i gotta do really well for all the rest of my semesters to get myself a place in some private banks and earn big bucks.
just a full load of crap.
besides that.
i seriously don't understand why lings and xian school life can be so bustling with activities.
but mine is just so...
i really don't wanna waste my uni life the way i did with my jc's.
we can leave everything else aside.
but guess what!
after paying almost 6k every semester;
we even gotta print out our own notes!
crap school.
blame myself for not working hard enough for A's.
as for work.
one of the full-time part-timer will be leaving next week.
i'll feel sad for sure.
she's a nice person.
taught and helped me a lot along the way.
but at the same time i feel happy.
partly because she's leaving for a better job.
and partly because i'll no longer hafta tolerate her pushing all her stuff to me while she sits there playing on my ds or doing all the easy job.
i'm not trying to bad-mouth her or anything.
but prolly our working style is different.
while i prefer "doing everything together".
like for example if i get to slack everyone is entitled to as well.
while she prefers the opposite i guess.
the part on friends will be a little depressing to talk about i guess.
-friend A:
we've totally drifted.
till the extent that i don't know if there's gonna be a way we can patch this gap up.
-friend B:
have been prettay mean to her.
but i'm all along that kinda person who doesn't entertain you if i don't like you.
don't like to be a hypocrite.
-friend C:
too involved to care anymore.
-friend D:
always right;
never wrong.
-friend F:
a stranger.
a liar.
and hopefully soon enough a memory.
or better still;
nothing.
on a happier note.
things are getting on a lot better for MLBF and me!
:]
but we're back to the meeting-once-every-week and real-talking-only-once-every-day thingy since school have started for the both of us.
:[
it's really frustrating sometimes.
but unavoidable i guess.
to michy, chel, ah neo, nana and levonne:
"i have some problems loading alicia's birthday pictures in myphotoalbum. thought it was done but there'll only be one picture there no matter how many time i try to upload. will try to sort it out and let u guys know again. sorry!"Invisible.
3:54 AM
she writes
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
HAPPY 24th MONTH ANNIVERSARY!to MLBF as well as myself.
may there be uncountable anniversaries to come!
:]
so looking forward to our night safari trip next month!
:]
hopefully it'll happen.
anyway.
happy 2008 everyone!
may all of us have a good year ahead!
:]
Somehow.
2:49 PM
she writes